WHY KRYCEK?
by Donna McIntosh
Summary: Alex Krycek finishes his last assignment then retires with A.D. Skinner.


Title: WHY KRYCEK?

Author: X-Files

Pairing: Skinner/Krycek

Rating: R

Permission to Archive: Yes

Genre: Slash

Summary: Alex Krycek finishes his last assignment then retires; with AD Skinner.

Warning: None

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Chris Carter. They'd get a lot more action if they belonged to me!

WHY KRYCEK?

"Krycek? Why Krycek? I'm sure you must have someone else I could work with." Walter Skinner was not too happy about his new assignment.

"I told you you'd be climbing; but you'll be going up as second man. Krycek will lead." Cassidy informed him.

"Me second to Krycek? I think I've changed my mind. He's the last person on this earth that I'd want to make a climb with."

"Too late, Skinner; you accepted the assignment. You can't back out now just because you don't like who you're assigned to work with."

"But why Krycek? You must have someone else who can climb?"

"A mountain, yes; a five story building; no."

"We're going up a building?" Skinner was becoming more and more sorry that he had accepted this chance to get away from his desk and take a field assignment.

"That's right. Krycek goes up first; he can do that much alone. I went you going up second to make sure he and the package that he's going up there to retrieve, gets back down. That's all you need to know. Be at the air field by 7 pm." Cassidy stood from the conference table; dismissing him.

"We make the climb at night? Of course." Skinner was getting a bad taste in his mouth about this development.

"7 pm. You can leave now, go check out your gear. Pack for 2 or 3 days."

Skinner drummed his fingers on the table top and stood to leave. He stared at her a moment then left.

"Shit!" He mumbled to himself. "Alex Krycek!" He thought he had seen the last of him; at least he hoped he had.

He snuggled the knit cap down over his ears and shoved his hands into his pockets. It was chilly and he wished he had taken the time to eat something but he had never made a climb without first checking, re-checking and re-re-checking his equipment. He had never had a gear mal-function on a climb and he sure and hell didn't want to have one climbing a five story building!

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a protein bar and nibbled at it. At least it would be something to make his stomach stop growling. He had just finished it when the truck rolled up.

Janna Cassidy and Alex Krycek got out; along with two others. Mulder and Scully.

"Oh crap," he thought. This is going to be one long miserable assignment. He could see it all now; he would end up playing referee the entire trip!

"I thought this was a two man job?" he asked as they approached.

"It is. A two man climb. Do you speak French?"

"No. I didn't know it was a requirement to climb."

"It isn't. But it is for Mulder's assignment."

"What exactly is Mulder's assignment?"

"You don't need to know that yet. I'll tell you when it's time."

"You're going along?"

"This one is a delicate situation; a little tact and diplomacy is required. Something none of you are familiar with." She led them towards the plane; all of them glaring silently at each other.

"How'd you let yourself get talked into this one?" Skinner asked Scully.

"It was a more-or-less command performance. She told me Mulder and you were going. She didn't say anything about Krycek though. Why the hell is HE going?"

"Looks like I'm going to be second man on this climb. He's going to lead."

"This is a climb?"

"Yeah. We're supposed to retrieve some package. I get the feeling she's worried that Krycek might not bring it back down and that I'm the insurance."

"This is going to be interesting." Scully said as they climbed into the plane.

They settled themselves quickly until the plane was in the air.

"What's your assignment, Mulder?" Skinner asked.

"I'm not really sure. She said something about me being a diversion."

"You don't need to speak French for that." Skinner said.

"Yeah, I know. Maybe we're going into Canada."

"Krycek!" Skinner called out.

"What?" He answered.

"You know where we're going? What this is all about?" Skinner asked.

"I'm climbing a building for a package; you're along to help me bring it back down; Mulder's along as a diversion; Scully's along in case either of us falls or some smart-ass creating a diversion takes a bullet. That's all I know." He folded his arms across his chest and went to sleep.

"Why is SHE coming along?" Scully nodded her head up front towards the cockpit area where Cassidy had disappeared.

Skinner shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, "Must be a pretty important package."

"You may as well get some sleep. We got a 12 hour flight ahead of us." Krycek said.

"12 hours? Shit! Europe!" Skinner said, more to himself than the others.

They dozed off and on during the flight walking around occasionally to stretch their tired muscles.

"I thought maybe you were along to look after HIM," Mulder said to Scully as he gestured to Krycek.

"Yeah, I noticed that." She answered looking at the bruised and battered face of a sleeping Krycek.

"Did you do that?" Skinner asked Mulder as he joined them for a bottle of water.

"Nope. Wish I had. Someone else had the pleasure, I guess."

"I just hope he's in shape to make this climb." Skinner said.

"I'm sure he is, or she wouldn't have chosen him." Scully said dismissing the matter.

The sun was rising as they landed at a small airstrip outside of Paris. They disembarked and piled into the back of a truck and were driven to a small farmhouse.

"Stay close to the house; we'll leave as soon as it gets dark. There's food, or beds if you want to nap. I'll be back around 7:30." Cassidy said as she dumped the four of them out and left in the truck.

"Well I, for one, am starving! Anyone want breakfast?" Scully said and headed for the kitchen.

"Not me," Mulder answered taking a seat across from Krycek who was lying down on the couch, "I just ate a pop tart."

"I could eat the side of this house," Skinner said following her, "I didn't eat dinner last night."

"You know you shouldn't skip a meal; it isn't good for you; especially right before you're making a climb." Scully scolded him. "You need your strength."

The two of them threw together some omelets; ham and eggs and vegetables and offered some to the others; they refused.

Mulder and Scully decided to take a walk after breakfast and Skinner remained behind with a second cup of coffee. He sat watching Krycek.

Krycek got up and got himself a cup of coffee and sat back down.

"So who'd you betray this time? Looks like they caught up with you. You must be getting old, Krycek."

Krycek chuckled. "Actually it was a BMW and it looks worse than I do. I'll heal up. It was totaled."

"You sure you can make this climb?" Skinner worried.

"Piece of cake." Krycek assured him; though his aching ribs weren't quite as sure.

"Why you, Krycek? Why'd Cassidy pick you for this job?"

"Don't know. Guess she likes me best." He grinned.

Skinner stared at him, trying to figure him and this situation out. He wasn't coming up with any answers.

"How is it she feels like she can call on you for something like this?"

"She calls on me for all the shit jobs she knows no one else will take." Krycek answered honestly.

"Why wouldn't anyone else take this assignment? Seems pretty straight forward to me."

Krycek stared at him a few moments, finished off his coffee and lay back down. "You'll see."

"I'll see what?"

"You'll see how straightforward this all is when you see what the package is."

"What IS the package? Or is it a 'who'?" Skinner asked but got no answer.

He decided to join Mulder and Scully outside for a walk-around.

The day passed agonizingly slowly but shortly after dark, Cassidy arrived.

"Everyone ready?" she asked.

They all agreed they were and piled into the truck. They drove for 45 minutes and came to stop in some woods behind a large fenced in compound just outside a city. There was a lot of activity going on; lots of people milling around.

"That's the building?" Skinner asked looking at the large old brick building. "You expect us to climb that unseen with all these people around? Looks like a party going on out there."

"There is. That's why it's the perfect timing." Cassidy scanned the place with her binoculars.

"Son of a bitch!" Skinner muttered under his breath as he looked at the old building he was expected to climb in the dark with a lot of people around and not get caught.

"With all that distraction, why do you need me?" Mulder asked.

"You're insurance that we WILL have a distraction at exactly the right time; just in case anybody starts to snoop around while our guys are in mid-climb."

"That's why you wanted me in a suit; so I could mingle with the guests?"

"That's it. You got your earphone on? I want to be able to direct you once things get under way."

"Yeah," Mulder fiddled with the device in his ear, securing it.

"OK, listen up." Cassidy started, "This is how it's going down. Krycek and Skinner go first. They make it to the back wall and wait. I want Mulder ready and waiting by the fence; in case we need him on either side. DO NOT start the climb until I give the order." Both Krycek and Skinner nodded their heads.

"Skinner, you stay put on the ground until Krycek makes it to the top. He'll drop you a rope and you can then make your climb. While you're climbing, Krycek will go in through a roof door that he has the key for and retrieve our package. By the time Skinner makes it to the top, Krycek should be ready to head back down. We've got a 15 minute window here; plenty of time. Ear phones?" she asked Krycek and Skinner. They both nodded yes.

"OK. Keep low and quiet crossing that field. The fence isn't wired so just cut through it."

"Wouldn't it be easier to go over it?" Skinner asked.

"Maybe; but not so easy coming back; besides, Mulder isn't exactly dressed to scale a fence."

"Two minutes; any questions?" she asked them.

"Yes, what if he doesn't retrieve this package that fast? Why such a short time frame?"

"He will; you just worry about getting up that wall and getting Krycek back down again."

Skinner resented being talked to like a green agent.

"OK. GO!" She said and they hopped down off the back of the truck.

The three of them made their way across the field and stopped at the fence. Krycek pulled out the wire cutters and made short work of it. He and Skinner slipped through and made a dash for the back of the building. Mulder stood his ground at the fence line waiting for orders.

Skinner and Krycek huddled in the dark against an out-building that jutted a few feet out into the parking area.

"How long we supposed to wait, it looks pretty clear to me. Most of the activity seems to be around front." Skinner whispered.

"I don't know. She's got some kind of diversion planned. She said we'd know it when we heard it." Krycek answered back.

Just then a loud bang and a popping noise like a machine gun went off and startled them both. The sky exploded in brilliant colors as the fireworks lit the night sky in front of the building.

"That's it!" Krycek said and started his climb. Up the wall he went; first on top of the shed, then from window sill to window sill, to tiny places in the brickwork trim. Skinner

watched in amazement. In less than five minutes and Krycek was at the top, lowering the rope.

Skinner grabbed it and started his climb. He was slower than Krycek but his climb was much more secure with the rope. He made it to the top and looked around. Krycek was no where in sight.

He cursed and set about making sure his ropes were secure for their climb down. He had tied his last knot when Krycek showed and said, "All set; let's go."

"Where's the package? I thought we were bringing someone back down. Couldn't you find him?"

"Right here,"

Krycek opened the flap of his jacket and Skinner saw a tiny baby wrapped in a blanket, sound asleep and duct taped securely to Krycek's chest.

"Holy shit! We're making this climb with a baby?"

"I told you, I only get the jobs no one else will take." He secured his jacket again and they started their climb down; each with a foot hold loop to stand in as Skinner lowered them slowly.

They had just started their decent when Cassidy called "HOLD!" in both their ear phones.

They looked around and saw Mulder racing over to the side of the building. They froze; hanging there five stories above the ground and Krycek mumbled, "Oh no," and put his head against the building.

"What is it?" Skinner whispered.

"Lightheaded…gonna…pass out." Krycek started to slump down.

Skinner grabbed him around the waist and shook him; slapped the side of his face.

"Oh no you don't! Krycek! Don't you dare!"

"Can't …help…it. Here. Take the baby." Krycek tried to fumble with the jacket opening.

"No way! Hold on! Just a minute." Skinner fumbled in Krycek's pockets and pulled out the roll of duct tape. He wrapped it around Krycek's waist and his own several times; securing him as they hung there. He winced at the noise it made and hoped that the sound of the fireworks would cover it; it did.

Krycek's head thudded against the side of the building and his legs went limp. Skinner held on tight, trying not to squash the baby. It never made a whimper. In a moment Krycek came around and managed to work his foot back into the loop. He took a few deep breaths while his head cleared.

"Thanks." He muttered.

"OK. Get down here now!" Cassidy called into their ear phones.

Skinner proceeded to lower them to the ground as fast as he could. He took his knife and slit through the tape just as Krycek bent over and started heaving. He went to his knees as Mulder skidded up beside them.

"Come on! What the hell you waiting for? What's the matter with him?"

Krycek leaned against the building and waited for his strength to return.

"Take it!" he said to Skinner and started undoing his jacket.

"No. You started this job, you'll finish it. On your feet! I'm not leaving you here."

"TIMES UP!" Cassidy was yelling into their ear phones, "GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!"

Skinner pulled Krycek to his feet. The fireworks had stopped. People were beginning to mill around again. The three of them took off towards the fence. Krycek stumbled and went to his hands and knees.

Skinner went to him.

"Please, take the baby. I'll come along later. I just need to rest."

"NO! This is your retrieval. Come on." Skinner hauled him to his feet and with an arm around his waist they made their way through the hole in the fence. Mulder was just climbing into the back of the truck as they heard the sirens going off.

Flood lights lit the compound; a siren wailed into the night; lights came on in every window; people were running around shouting.

Skinner grabbed a tighter hold and practically dragged Krycek across the field and into the truck. As soon as they were in, the truck took off into the woods for deeper cover and out the back and onto a side road. Soon they were on the highway and headed for the air field.

"Where's the package? You screwed up, Krycek! You didn't get the package!" Mulder accused.

Krycek unzipped his jacket and un-taped the baby.

"Oh my God; a baby!" Scully cooed. "Let me have it." She reached for the baby who started to fuss the minute it left the warmth of Krycek's chest.

"Here. I thought we might need these too." Krycek reached into his pocket and pulled out two diapers, a bottle of milk, and a pacifier.

Cassidy said nothing; she was too busy on the phone speaking with her next contact.

With the climb behind them, Skinner's heart went back to beating normally as they drove through the night bouncing around in the back of the truck.

"Here; you can take some of these now." Cassidy tossed a bottle of pills to Krycek. He opened it and took three out and swallowed them; washed them down with some bottled water.

"What are those for?" Skinner asked.

"Ribs," Krycek answered.

"Ribs?" Skinner asked.

"Yeah, he's got a couple busted ribs and a concussion. He'll heal." Cassidy said and went back to her phone calls.

"She sent you up there with broken ribs and a concussion?" Skinner was incredulous!

"I made it." Krycek said with a little grin and a sigh of relief.

They stopped at the air field and got out. Cassidy took the baby over to a parked car waiting there. The baby was handed inside and a fat envelope was handed to Cassidy. The car took off and the rest of them boarded the plane.

Cassidy walked by and dropped an envelope in Krycek's lap without saying a word then went to the cockpit area and left the four of them alone for the flight home. Skinner noticed it was not the same envelope Cassidy had received. This one was much thinner.

"So what were you talking with them about?" Scully was asking Mulder.

"I was asking them where the nearest whorehouse was. My knowledge of the French language is limited to just the basics."

Scully laughed and gazed at him with admiration.

Skinner sneered and tried to get comfortable.

Krycek fumbled with his hand under his shirt.

"You OK?" Skinner asked.

"Yeah; just trying to get this ace bandage to stay in place."

Skinner went over to him and gave him a hand. He raised Krycek's shirt and gasped at the bruising his saw. These were fresh bruises; less than a week old. He said nothing just rewrapped and secured the bandages as best he could.

"Too bad we don't have a doctor along who could look after this," Skinner said glancing over at Scully who was deep in discussion with Mulder about something that must have been terribly funny; they were both laughing.

"They're having a good time. Mulder's got a lot of stories to tell." Krycek tucked his shirt back in and settled down for a nap.

"Apparently." Skinner agreed and took a seat across from Krycek.

They were more than halfway home and everyone was fast asleep. Skinner stood to stretch his legs. He opened another bottle of water and drank. He was getting too old for this, he thought, all he wanted was to get home and get some sleep in his own bed. He was beyond tired.

Krycek stood up with a little moan and stretched as much as he could. He took the bottle of pills out of his pocket and fumbled with the lid.

"Here. Let me give you a hand with that." Skinner opened the bottle for him and dumped three pills in his hand. Krycek accepted them eagerly along with the bottle of water Skinner offered him.

"Thanks. These don't help all that much but at least they take the edge off." He drank half the bottle down.

"So you get the rewards? Is that how this plays out?" Skinner asked.

"This was my last job. I'm retiring," Krycek said and handed Skinner the envelope Cassidy had given him.

He opened it and read. It was immunity papers. Krycek was free and cleared of any and all charges made against him.

"Your freedom from prosecution. Looks like you're getting out of this scott free."

Skinner handed him back the papers.

"I think I've pretty much paid for my stupid mistakes." Krycek folded the letter and stuck it back in his jacket.

"So what are you going to do now? Go into business for yourself? I thought that's what you've been doing?"

"Nope. I said I'm retiring and I meant it. I'm going to find myself a hole and crawl in and sleep for at least a month. Then I'll decide where I want to go and what I want to do. I'm not making any decisions until the time comes that I'm healed up and well rested."

"Sounds like a good idea." Skinner finished his bottle of water and tossed it in the trash.

"Since you're out of it now, maybe you can answer just one question for me?"

"What would that be?" Krycek asked.

"Why'd you do it? Why'd you leave the bureau to work for Spender?"

Krycek grinned up at him. "If I told you, you wouldn't believe me."

"Try me." Skinner encouraged him.

"OK. Would you believe that I didn't know I HAD left the bureau until it was too late?"

"What the hell you talking about?" Skinner squinted back at him.

"My first day at the Hoover, I walked in the door and went to the second floor like I was told. As I got off the elevator, he was waiting for me. He ushered me into his office; at least I assumed it was his office; welcomed me aboard and said how pleased he was that I had been assigned to the Hoover. He said he would have some special assignments for me from time to time and that I was to keep our arrangement confidential and not to discuss it with anyone and then dismissed me to meet my new AD."

"He didn't introduce himself?"

"Of course not; I had no idea who he was. He met me, knew me, I assumed he was some specialist there to give the new agents their assignments."

"How long did it take you to figure it out? And when you did, why didn't you go to your AD?"

"By then it was too late. I was trapped."

"What do you mean, trapped?"

"I had taken someone out for them. They had photos of me on the roof with the gun; they had the gun with my fingerprints on it. Once I realized what I had gotten myself into, I went to the old man and had it out with him. He said I was to do what he said or he'd turn me in and with his connections, he could assure I'd get the death penalty. I wasn't ready to die at 23!"

"23? You couldn't have been 23. You have to be 25 to get into Quantico and two years there; you should have been 27."

"I lied about my age. I was ready and I didn't see that a few years could make any

difference."

"You still should have gone to your AD."

"Maybe; but by then I wasn't sure who I could trust. I knew the old man had connections in the building; I didn't know who they were."

"So you stayed?"

"Yeah; I stayed. One day I got a chance to meet with and talk to Cassidy. I told her everything. She said if I helped her out for a few years, she'd see about getting me immunity. She held up her end of the bargain; of course it took her nearly 9 years to do it; but once we land; I'm outta here."

"Is there any way I could talk you into sticking around for a few days? I have a lot of questions I'd like the answers to."

"I'll answer any questions you have until the plane lands. That gives you about four hours of questions. I need to get something to eat then you can start."

Krycek rummaged through their meager supplies and came out with a packaged sandwich and a small container of peaches. He sat down on his cushion and started eating.

"I don't know where to begin," Skinner said, pinching the bridge of his nose and rubbing a hand over his tired face. He had hoped for the chance of a good nights sleep first and the opportunity to give some thought to a list of questions. He sat down across from Krycek and began.

He started by asking questions about the cases he knew Krycek had been involved in or may have some knowledge of. He was surprised at Krycek's openness and willingness to

answer each question fully and in detail. Before he knew it he felt the jerk of the plane with the landing gear being lowered.

He stood and looked out the window in the door; they were about to land.

"Damn, and I have a lot more questions."

"Time flies when you're having fun! Krycek said with a grin.

"Is that what we were doing? Having fun?" Skinner asked and sat back down.

"Not really but as much fun as I'm up to right now."

"Have you even seen a doctor?"

"Yeah. I'll be OK. Just need a little rest."

"No more buildings to climb?"

"Nope. My days of intrigue are over." He smiled and stood up with a little effort after the plane came to a stop on the runway.

Cassidy came into the cabin then and left with Mulder and Scully following behind.

"You just going to leave?" Skinner asked.

"Uh huh."

"Can I give you a ride somewhere?"

"Nah; thanks."

They climbed down the steps of the plane and into the bright sunlit morning.

"Krycek," Skinner stopped him as he started off in a different direction once they made it to the parking lot.

"Yeah?"

"I still have more questions. Can I buy you breakfast somewhere?"

"No thanks. I appreciate the offer though. See you around." And with that he disappeared into the rows of parked cars.

Skinner tried to see where he was going but had to jump out of the way of a car load of people honking at him. When he looked back, Krycek was gone.

Skinner met Cassidy heading for her car.

"So, he's gone?" She asked.

"Yeah," Skinner answered.

"I suppose he filled your head with what a hero he was; how many times he saved your life, all that crap."

"No; he didn't mention anything about that."

"He didn't? I'm stunned. I thought that would be the first thing he'd do. He's probably saving it for a surprise. You two meeting up later I guess. He talked you into leaving the bureau too?"

"We didn't discuss it."

"You didn't? You'll probably hear all about it tonight over a candle-lit dinner."

"What exactly are you implying?" Skinner stopped beside her car and asked as she unlocked the door.

"He didn't tell you he's crazy about you? What the hell DID the two of you talk about

all those hours we were in the air?"

"He saved my life; when?"

"Oh Christ! I don't know; three or four times though. I can't believe he didn't tell you; and that he was the one who found Scully and got her to the hospital that time after she was kidnapped? He didn't tell you any of that? Strange guy." She got in her car, keyed the ignition and took off.

Skinner stood in the middle of the parking lot in stunned silence.

(end of part 1 of 2 parts)

WHY KRYCEK (Part 2 of 2 parts)

Four months later…

The radio announced an accident on the causeway so Skinner decided to take the long way home; straight through the oldest section of town. It was after 8 pm so most of the traffic had died down. He was wending his way through the narrow streets when he heard the sirens; fire trucks. It was a bitterly cold night and someone had probably tried to heat their apartment using their stove, or a curtain fell against a space heater, or one of a hundred other reasons why these old buildings catch fire. He took an alley, hoping to miss the worst of it but came out right in the middle of all the excitement.

People were running in all different directions, yelling, trying to evacuate the building. Some were standing around staring; obviously in shock. Two were lying side by side on the pavement; someone was huddled over them; going back and forth between them.

A flash of recognition and a cold fist of apprehension gripped him. Krycek!

He pulled his car to a stop at the end of the alley; a fireman came over to him.

"Sorry buddy, you can't park there; you'll have to back up the way you came."

Skinner got out and showed him his badge.

"Sorry sir; didn't know the FBI had been called in on this."

"That's alright. Why don't you see to those people over there." Skinner pointed to more people who came staggering out of the burning building.

Skinner made his way over to the two people on the pavement and the man crouching between them.

"Krycek?"

A soot-covered, tear stained face turned up to him in the middle of all the chaos. "Papaw," the word was choked out as he gripped the hand of the old man lying in the street in front of him. "Mamaw," he reached out and touched the shoulder of the white haired woman lying next to them.

Skinner reached down and touched the neck of each of them looking for a pulse. There was none. They were both gone.

"We gotta get them to a hospital. Help me, Skinner," he tried to lift the old man.

"Krycek, it's no use. They're gone."

'No! No," he cried, "Papaw, come on now. Get up. We gotta get Mamaw to the hospital. Wake up."

A TV news truck showed up then and started shooting film; a reporter was talking into the camera.

"Krycek, come on. We've got to get you out of here before you end up on the 10 o'clock news.

"No, No. We can't leave them."

"Krycek, listen to me. They're gone. We have to leave here. Now!"

He got Krycek to stand but before he would leave Krycek reached down and took the photo album the old woman was clutching in her hands; the only thing she had been able to save. Skinner got the two of them through the crowd and into his car. He backed down the alley and exited on the next street; turned the car around and headed for his condo.

"You alright?"

No answer. Krycek sat staring out into the night.

Thirty minutes later he pulled into the parking garage. He drove around the area a few minutes to make sure no one had followed him. The coast was clear. He got out and went around the other side and opened the door. Krycek just sat there. Skinner took him by the arm and led him to the elevator. In minutes they were inside the condo.

He sat Krycek down in a kitchen chair and fixed him a stiff drink. He wouldn't touch it.

He fixed coffee then and did manage to get him to take a few sips.

"They were your Grandparents? Your records said you had no living relatives."

"They took care of me after my mother died. We lived in the same building; across the hall."

Skinner sat opposite him at the table and sipped his coffee.

"I was 13 when she died. They let me stay with them till the state welfare found out and said I couldn't stay there; said they were too old to be foster parents; so I ran away. I always came back to see them though. They practically raised me. My mother was….sick a lot."

"What about your father? Were your parents divorced?"

"Never married." He sighed deeply and leaned back in his chair. "My mother was a prostitute. She didn't have the slightest idea who my father was. She was either drunk or…busy, so I spent a lot of time with the Millers. They had no children of their own. They always used to tell me they were just waiting for me to come along." He stood up and went over to the kitchen sink and splashed water on his face. He wiped on a hand towel and sat back down.

"I ate most of my meals over at their place. They even signed my report cards for me." He laid his head down on his crossed arms and wept. Skinner came around behind and massaged his shoulders, trying to think of something soothing to say to him. There was nothing to be said. No way to soothe this pain.

"Come on. Let's get you upstairs. You're staying here tonight." Skinner took him up to the guest room and ran a tub of hot water for him. "A nice hot soak will warm you up some."

Skinner helped him undress and got him into the tub. While Krycek soaked, Skinner made the bed up with fresh linens. He brought in an old sweat suit that he liked wearing to sleep in. It was soft and warm and comfortable. Krycek put it on and climbed into bed. He curled up on his side; eyes closed.

Skinner gathered up the soot covered clothes and took them downstairs to the laundry room. He emptied out the pockets and shoved them into the washer and turned it on.

He picked up the small pile of personal belongings; keys, wallet, cash, gun, knife and headed upstairs with them. He paused in the hall a minute looking at the wallet. The FBI

in him wanted to go through the wallet but the 'friend' in him couldn't do it. He walked into the guest room and laid the belongings on the night. Stand. He left the room leaving the door ajar so he could hear if he was needed.

Skinner went back downstairs and fixed himself something to eat. While he ate the sandwich he looked at the photo album; first wiping it clean with a dish towel.

Page after page of a smiling little boy opened up before him, growing up; raggedy clothes, shoes with holes in them, a sweater that was way too big. A woman with long dark hair holding the smiling infant; she had seen better days. Always the boy was smiling, hugging his "Papaw or Mamaw". Report cards and award certificates stuck in between the pages. Alex Krycek was obviously loved by these people; blood relatives or not.

He was mesmerized by the album and couldn't put it down until he had scrutinized each and every photo and certificate and report card. Alex was a straight 'A' student, no discipline marks on any of them, and admirable comments by each teacher. His class photos were there, up until the gangly young teen seemed to disappear. There was the letter from the authorities telling them to turn Alex over to the state; and another letter warning them to be sure and contact them if they heard of or learned where Alex was.

From that point on, there were few photos. Some taken on the old folk's birthdays showed Alex wearing a silly pointed hat and putting one on his Mamaw while she sat in front of a fancy store-bought birthday cake; another of Alex and Papaw shoveling snow off the front sidewalk. There were a few of Alex as a grown up. His letter of acceptance into the police academy; letters addressed to them that were obviously from Alex that he couldn't bring himself to read. That was just too personal. He couldn't do that.

The last photo was one taken on the grounds at Quantico. Skinner recognized some of the buildings and landscape features. He looked very much like Skinner remembered him when they had first met nine years ago. He stared a long time at that photo. Someone had snapped it with a Polaroid. He was standing there with a big smile on his face looking straight into the camera and making an "OK" sign with his thumb and index finger.

How things had changed for that young man, Skinner thought. How twisted this world is that could create such a smiling happy little boy and set him up for a fall. He had overcome so much and made it so far only to step into Spender's web.

"You never really had a chance, did you?" He muttered to the photograph.

"As much as anybody in this fucked up world does." The voice came from behind him and Skinner turned around quickly to see Krycek standing there leaning against the kitchen doorway.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry. I didn't think you'd mind." He stood and closed the album.

"It's alright. It was her most prized possession." He came into the room and took the album in his hands. He didn't open it; just caressed the outside cover. "Thanks for cleaning it up."

"Can I get you something to eat?"

"No, just some coffee, please." He sat down at the table. "They were the closest thing I ever had to a family."

"I'm glad you had them; glad they were there for you." Skinner placed a cup of coffee on the table for him and refilled his own. He had a feeling this was going to be a long night.

"I need to see about funeral arrangements for them."

"I can help you with that. You need to keep a low profile; Spender could still be looking for you."

"I don't give a damn about Spender."

"I know you don't but right now you're vulnerable and that's when mistakes are made. Let me help you with the arrangements. We can set them up anonymously."

"I don't care about all that shit right now, Walter."

"I know. That's why you need my help. We can do it through my attorney. He's an ex-marine buddy of mine. Everything will be kept in strictest confidence. He won't even need to know your name. We can set it all up on a John Doe basis with him."

"Whatever. I really don't care."

"What about the Millers? Don't you think that they'd care? How do you think they would feel knowing that their passing put you in jeopardy? Do you think they would want that?"

Krycek was silent. "You're right. It's just…that I feel guilty. I hadn't been to see them in so long. I was afraid the old man was having me followed; I didn't want to lead him there. By the time I got there tonight, smoke was already pouring out of the building. I found them in the hallway."

"You did the right thing then by staying away. I'm sure the Millers understood even without any detailed explanations."

Krycek finished his coffee and stood. "You said I could stay here tonight?"

"Sure. No problem. I'll have my attorney here in the morning and the two of you can go over funeral plans."

"Thanks." With that said, he went up the stairs and to bed.

Skinner's attorney came by the next day with brochures showing the different plans available. A plan was selected and two days later the funeral was held. The old couple already had burial plots and everything went off without a hitch; Walter and his attorney accompanying Krycek to the funeral to keep an eye on things.

The day of the funeral it was cold and windy. The service was short with only a few neighbors in attendance. Afterwards Skinner drove them back to his condo after dropping his attorney off.

They went inside and Skinner fixed sandwiches and soup. They ate in silence.

"I don't know how I'll ever be able to thank you for this, Walter." Alex stood to leave.

"You don't have to leave just yet, do you?" He didn't know what to say to make him stay. He did want him to stay.

"I gotta get out of here; do something with my life. It's time to make some decisions and I don't really know what to do."

"Then it's not a good time to make decisions. You only make important decisions when you're of sound mind and body and you're absolutely sure about things. Why not stay here a while. It's a secure building; more or less." He had to grin at the last part of that statement knowing how many times Krycek had come in to this place uninvited.

"Yeah, I know how safe this place is," Krycek gave a sad little grin.

"I'm serious. Now is not a good time for you to be wandering around out there. You're welcome to the guest room for as long as you like."

"Maybe I will stay the night. My head's just a little bit fuzzy. It should be clear by morning." He headed for the stairway.

"Let me know if you need anything," Walter called up the stairs after him.

He sat at his desk trying to do some work but he couldn't concentrate so he decided to give it up and turn in early. He showered and got into bed. It was some time before he finally fell asleep.

Finger tips caressed his shoulder as a warm body snuggled in behind him. Kisses pressed into the back of his neck and a hand sliding down beneath the elastic waistband of his pajamas woke him. He knew who it was before he was full awake.

"Alex? What are you doing?" He whispered and stopped the hand before it got any lower.

"You said if I needed anything…." The voice was husky; the hand persistent.

"This is not what I meant." He held the hand that kept trying to go lower.

"It's what I need."

"Alex; think a minute about what you're doing."

"Please, Walter…I need you. I need this tonight."

"You'll hate me afterwards." Walter turned over and faced him.

"I won't; I promise. Please!" He reached for Walter and brought their mouths together.

Walter was hesitant at first, trying to come up with some reason why they shouldn't be doing this but his mind lost out to his body and the passionate heat that it was generating.

Their kisses were hard and brutal and Alex clung to him with the desperation of a drowning man. Walter gave back as good as he got, answering Alex's need to be taken and taken hard. It was an exhausting session and he felt no pleasure after release. Alex clung to him afterwards, sobbing.

Walter cleaned them both up and lay back down. His heart ached for this man who had spent his life, out of place, abused and mistreated. He pressed kisses into the thick dark hair and held him close until the tears stopped and he gentled into sleep.

When he awoke the next morning, Alex was gone. Walter called out to him, thinking he was in the bathroom or guest room but no answer came and a quick search of the apartment showed he was alone. He sat down on the steps; more alone than he had ever felt in his life.

"Shit, Walter, why Alex Krycek? Of all the men or women in the world available to you, why did you have to fall for him?" Tommy asked his old buddy as they sat across from one another in the hotel bar.

"I didn't say I'd fallen for him; I just said I was worried about him." Walter promptly corrected him.

"We've been sitting here almost two hours and we haven't talked about anything else."

"If I'm boring you, you can always leave. I'm sure our waiter would be more than happy to spend a little time with you alone. He hasn't taken his eyes off you since we got here."

"That's because I've been with him before; couple of years ago. I'm not bored with the conversation, Walter, I'm worried about you. I just don't understand why this guy means so much to you."

"I didn't say he did." Walter was defensive.

"OK," Tommy sighed, "You're not interested in him; you just can't get your mind off of him."

"I'm sorry, Tommy. It's just that it's been weeks and I don't even know if he's dead or alive."

"You want me to do some checking around?"

"Actually, I was going to ask you about that." He smiled as he sipped his drink. "You think you could do some digging for me? Use your banking connections and see if any of his credit cards have been used and where?"

"I can do that. You said he's also gone by the name of Artzen? Spell that."

Walter spelled it out for him and Tommy wrote it down in his notebook.

"I suppose you need this information, like, yesterday?"

"As soon as possible, Tommy. I'm going nuts here."

"I'll see what I can come up with and give you a call."

"Thanks, Tommy."

The phone call came the next afternoon. "I'm sorry, Walter, but your boyfriend has covered his tracks pretty thoroughly. There hasn't been activity in any of his accounts for nearly a year."

"I was afraid of that. And Tommy, he's not my boyfriend."

"Maybe not at the moment but I have a feeling he will be as soon as you find him."

"I'm way too old for him; nearly 15 years older. I'm sure he's got somebody else by now."

"From what I've been able to dig up on this guy, that may be the best thing all around. This guy lives on the edge; you'd never know a moment's peace."

"I don't care about that."

"I know you don't. I'm just trying to look at the brighter side of things here."

"I don't see any brighter side."

"Well, Christmas is coming up, a time for miracles. Maybe you'll get lucky."

"I hate Christmas. I haven't enjoyed Christmas since I was a kid. All it is to me is a time to be alone and get drunk and I can do that any weekend."

"You don't have to be alone. Why don't you come on over to the General's for Christmas Eve. The guys are going to be there; Walker's coming in from Dallas."

"I'll see him while he's here but I don't know about Christmas Eve. I'll probably just stay home."

"You're not going to meet anyone that way."

"I'm not looking to meet anyone."

"I know, I know. You've already got someone who isn't your boyfriend."

"This conversation is going nowhere. I need to get back to work and so do you. Thanks for your help, Tommy, I do appreciate it even though it doesn't sound like it."

"You're welcome, Walter, and PLEASE, reconsider and join us for Christmas Eve."

"I'll think about it. Maybe I'll come by just for a drink."

"That's my boy. I'm going to hold you to that now. You stop by for sure; at least for one drink. I'll tell the guys you're coming."

"You never give up, do you?" Walter leaned back in his chair and grinned.

"Never. See you Christmas Eve!"

"Yeah; see you."

Walter hung up the phone with a sigh. Christmas, the season for miracles! He shook his head. There was only one miracle he wanted and he knew he had no more chance of getting it than he did of getting that huge electric train display out side the toy store they put up every year in his home town and he begged his parents each year for one just like it. There would be no miracles for Walter Skinner this year. His phone rang and he got back to work.

Walter cursed as he made his third round of the parking lot trying to find a place to park. He finally spotted a couple coming out the mall entrance with arms full of packages and slowly followed them and waited for them to get into their car and pull out.

"The last fucking thing I need to be doing on Christmas Eve is going to the mall," he thought to himself but he never missed taking the General a box of cigars for Christmas and every place he called was closed except the one at the mall. He made his way through the crowd and looked for the directory. The tobacco shop was right across from the toy store.

"That's just great! I can get myself tangled in the crowd of stressed out parents fighting to get the last Tickle Me Elmo!" He muttered as he made his way through the crowd towards the tobacco shop.

The closer he got to the shop the worse the crowd got. He hadn't even been in a mall in years and now he remembered why he hated these places so much. It was then he heard the whistle; a train whistle. He saw the display as he turned the corner. It was surrounded by a hoard of bug-eyed children and tired parents just grateful for a chance to stop and gather their thoughts for a minute.

This display was huge; the table had to be 15 or 20 feet long; covered with little hills and towns and tunnels and even a waterfall; with little trains running all over. He was fascinated by it and stood looking over the heads of the children. Little lights were blinking, artificial snow was on all the buildings and even a tiny snowman with a top hat stood in the school yard beside the yellow school buses. This display was truly amazing!

Each group of children would squeal as the little train came by them; parents were tugging on their kids, wanting to finish up and go home; tired babies were whining and Christmas music was playing. He stood for several moments mesmerized by the sight. His eyes followed one little passenger train down the opposite side of the table to the end and for some reason, looked up.

Alex Krycek was standing there watching him over the heads of several children. Their eyes met and Walter's breath caught. "Alex!" He wasn't sure if he said the name or just thought it. He made his way to the end of the table, not taking his eyes off Alex for a second. He wanted to leap over the table and grab him; afraid he might lose him in the crowd but Alex only movement was a few steps closer as Walter came around the end of the table.

Once he was there, face to face, he didn't know what to say.

"Hi," was all he could come up with.

"Hi, yourself," Alex answered with a smile.

Two kids pushed between them and made their way to the train table.

"I always wanted one of these as a kid; always wanted the whole deal; never got it though. I did get one of those little ones, you know, that just ran in a circle."

A baby, out past its bedtime, began to wail behind them.

"You ever have a train set?" Walter asked.

"No, I never did; always wanted one though."

"I'll buy you one. You got someplace we could set one of these up?"

"No. I've just got a couple of rooms."

"This will need a room by itself; a big room. I guess we'd better get us a place then; a place with lots of big rooms."

Alex stared at him, a look of wonder on his face.

"Should be out in the country somewhere; I like the country, do you?" Walter went on.

"Uh huh," Alex answered, dumfounded.

"I would like to stay in the New England area though; you like this area? Or we could go out west if you prefer a drier climate?"

"No, I like this area," Alex answered with a grin.

"Good. Of course, putting together something like this will take a lot of time so I guess I'd better retire."

"Walter, what are you talking about?" Alex was afraid to hope; afraid to believe what he thought he was hearing.

"I've got more than enough time in to retire. I've been thinking about it for some time. Just never knew what I'd do with myself, all alone with nothing to do and no one to do it with. Which do you like best; the yellow trimmed passenger train or the red?" He pointed to the train table.

"Either one," Alex answered but didn't take his eyes off Walter.

"Then I think we should get both; and I like that freight train with all those box cars."

"They're very nice," Alex agreed.

"Listen, I got a party I need to go to tonight. Why don't you come with me? I'd love for you to meet my friends." Walter turned his full attention back to Alex.

"I'm not much for parties."

"This is a small get together; just a few friends. It would mean a lot to me. We could just stop by and have a drink then leave. We need to talk about where we want to live; see about finding us a place." Walter stepped a little closer, his shoulder nudging against Alex's.

"You're crazy, Walter! Do you have any idea what it sounds like you're asking?"

"Yes, I do. I'm asking you for a date. I want to take you to a party and show you off to my friends; I want us to find a place and move in together, I want to buy you this train set up for Christmas. Would you be interested in any of that?" He held his breath and waited for an answer.

"Yeah; yeah I would. I guess we do need to talk about it." Alex shook his head in wonder.

"Great! First I need to pick up a box of cigars for the General, then we're off." Walter linked his arm through Alex's and pulled him towards the tobacco shop; they disappeared into the crowd.

The train whistle blew, Deck the Halls blared from the loud speakers, and the bell from the Salvation Army Lady standing by the kettle clanged. It was Christmas. Time for miracles.

The End


End file.
